A Halloween to Remember

Sorry I haven't written on the blog for so long, my computer's been broken evens since Rudolph jammed the CD tray with fortune cookies. And Jojo crawled in through the air vents at night and broke into our house. He sold my keyboard on the black market and stole my mom's weave. So my computer has not only been broken, but keyboardless.

But good news! My mom has swine! She got it the same day she ate a waffle from the WaffleShack, and she sued them for giving her the disease. Her evidence was that the cashier was wearing pink (go local court!) She used the money to not only surgecially remove her arm flab but by herself a new computer (I got the old one).

So yeah. MCM is still broken up, and I haven't talked to my former BestBroFo'evsies since September when I asked him in science if his leg was red from rug burn or a common rash (it was a combination of the two, fyi). 

But Gilbert and I are still trying to find new band mates. I sent muffin baskets to Celine Dion and Selena Gomez, but none of which have responded yet. But whatevsies.

So two days ago, Halloween strolled by. I found out about Halloween actually the night before when I was chatting with Gilbert on IM (he was explaining to me how to tie a knot if your thumbs are cut off). 

GilbyMasta: and then you do a double sailor knot to finish it off

STUDlypony: ok. i think i got it.

GilbyMasta: do you really?

STUDlypony: no. knots r 4 squarez.

STUDlypony: you wanna egg a Christmas Tree Shop tomorrow?

GilbyMasta: cant im bleaching my cat

STUDlypony: y

GilbyMasta: its Halloween. duh. she's being a ghost

STUDlypony: WHOA. HOLD UP. do you just say 2morrow was halloween?

GilbyMasta: fo sho

STUDlypony: OMG i dont have a costume

GilbyMasta: just be a mouse and put on mouse ears

STUDlypony: lame

GilbyMasta: be a teletubbie

STUDlypony: no way tubbie custard is not cheap

GilbyMasta: be hannah montana

STUDlypony: dude im not being the same thing three years in a row

GilbyMasta: fine don't be anything at all

STUDlypony: ur right. costumez r for wittle babiez

GilbyMasta: y do u spell everything with a z?

STUDlypony: iz coolz.

GilbyMasta: anyways want to just watch scary movies at my place? we got a new scented candle

STUDlypony: im bringing the frozen corndogs

GilbyMasta: And I'll bring the powdered milk 

STUDlypony: soundz like a planz

So there we were on Halloween night, watching Fatal Kittens 2: Revenge of the Me-OW! zombies. Gilbert was eating M&Ms and then spitting them out in a bowl (he loves the taste of them but he can't eat them because he's allergic to circular candies) and I was stalking the Jonas Brothers on Twitter. So it was a pretty awesome nice. Then all of the sudden, a CRASH came! The window across from us shattered, and a rock landed at our feet (good thing we were both wearing wooden clogs). Laughter came from outside, and we looked down to see there was a note attached to the rock.

you r lamepants

This was the falsest thing I'd ever read. I am not lame, and neither are my pants. It takes a lot of courage for a guy to shop at Delias, especially since there is not boys section (but my legs are wicked skinny and no guys jeans fit me). And although the bottom of Gilbert's pants are sewn together (his mom is paranoid his feet will freeze and fall off), they aren't lame either. 

I know only three people who could have done this.

1) Nick Jonas. But according to Twitter he's in Dallas, so this can't be.

2) Jojo. But he's probably dressing up as a kid again to go trick-or-treating and get free candy (until he gets locked up), so this can't be either.

3) Shrub-Larry-Roxie (I count them as one person). My arch foes.

This. Means. War.

[You know something dramatic is going to happen when there is a period after each word.]